Bronwyn, Amy, Kayla, Sean, and I were sitting in the Kwajalein airport waiting for the west bound flight to the recent Saipan invitational swim meet. Around us were the usual smattering of Marshallese travelers in their brightly coloured, matching dresses and shirts; lime green with huge white, red, and brown flowers. The sparkling tan and bronze beaded rickrack running across the necklines and sleeves reflected the glints of sunlight that would occasionally flash through the slowly rotating black clouds of TS Bavi w-073, the baby typhoon that had formed around us and was passing. The IMCOM Pacific Region General, his retinue, as well as the SMDC Brigadier General and his crew were in the VIP room. 2 of the ever faithful Kwaj fire and rescue team were packed and ready for a long anticipated and planned vacation to Australia. Children scampered and played hide and seek between and behind chairs. One of our friends looked at her ticket and said, “my ticket says “Gate subject to change.’” …….There it was, one of those laughter filled life moments that just makes us see things from a different perspective.
Kwaj airport has one gate. There may be two doors facing the runway, but the tiny waiting room and with its sole attendant stand next to the Plexiglas case of WWII artifacts and echoing high, military-stark walls and ceiling DEFINITELY has one identified gate. Sure, there are several egresses, but only one unnumbered gate. We joked about what could serve as another gate, laughed about the unnecessary printed warning, and eventually went back to our own wait; but that simple phrase was with me for the entire trip, showing up again and again in practice more than writing. “Gate subject to change.”
That was 15 days ago, and I am still not home. My “gates” throughout this trip have definitely been changing - every single day. TS Bavi w-073 hit Saipan the evening after the swim meet. As I drove to the airport to find out if one of our team coaches would be able to arrive from Guam, I wondered if his ticket had warned him about a potential gate change in his plans for that day. He never arrived, and had a permanent change to return to Kwaj. As I negotiated with the hotel to allow me and Bronwyn to stay in our room until we could arrange seats to Guam, I chuckled about our gate change for that day. I am sure the hotel staff thought I had lost my mind, standing there with 2 bottles of champagne for me and Amy, grinning as I convinced them we would be delayed. As I stood in the dark and deserted Saipan Airport while the emergency flight that the airline flew to get travelers to Guam left without us, I wondered about how many gates and gate changes we would experience before we left Saipan or made it further. As Amy and I took Sean and Brownyn to see if the ATV trek we had reserved would still go in the 35-40 mph winds, I smiled about the “gate safety” sign we passed next to the light post that was blown onto our car during our ATV ride. YES, you read that right! The ATV ride that Amy and I took with the kids and several Japanese tourists, in 40 MPH winds, while TS Bavi moved across the island.
I have discovered over years of family practice, is that most people actually work very hard to force this dynamic world to be the same, mundane, and unobtrusive – SERIOUSLY? In the crazily overwhelming vortex that is the world outside Rat Race? Over and over, I have worked with people who are struggling to assimilate things that confront their sense of stability. Whether the challenge is physical change, like pregnancy or death; emotional change; spiritual change – it never matters. Change is HARD; and we rarely get the advanced notice that in life, our gates are subject to change…….
Since Ian was born, one of my prayers for my children has been “Father, keep Ian, Bronwyn, Keira, Will, me and our family and Godfamily well, happy healthy and safe in body, mind and spirit.” I find myself praying this in the shower as I stand, present to the water and the sound of the family laughter outside the door; or ride my bike to the hospital, mesmerized by the utter and spellbinding beauty of sunrise. What I find, though, is that I need to actively be reminded that life is constantly changing – challenging us to be better than we are – Demanding us to reach deep in our souls for resilience – Pulling us to discomfort that expands our awareness of our monumentally incredible world.
In the Rat Race, the wheel and cage never change. Outside that limiting, constricting box is the unknown in every step of leaving life-sucking repetitiveness behind. What’s stopping you from glancing outside your cage today? Sure, there may be a typhoon-like cacophony of chaos and unknown; but here’s your warning/opportunity today: Based on life’s capricious and magical whim, Your gate is subject to change. Now, what are YOU going to do when that happens?
